“My Best”

Being a parent is tough business. Duh.

I don’t feel like I’m half the parent mine were. Somehow I feel like I get more easily frustrated. Like I grow weary more easily. Like it’s harder.  Somehow they made it look easier.

As a parent (or maybe me) it’s something I work hard to fight constantly.  Hard to balance not letting things slide but letting the right things slide.  Not letting buttons get pressed and letting things roll off your back no matter how annoying because they’re just being kids.

Sometimes the day is beating you down and you feel like you’re just not doing it right.

And then at the end of the day you’re bathing the little one when she turns to you out of the blue and says, “You’re the best mom. You make me happy. I love you.”

And you melt because she’s never said anything like that. No matter what happened that evening or that day or yesterday or ever mattered because she still loves you.

Mornings are hectic and days are fraught with guilt for rushing them out the door and sad faces from stressing everyone out.  But pick ups are always filled with happy faces and love.  And knowing I’m still they’re best.

That’s some serious love. Must be doing something right.

Thank God.


8 thoughts on ““My Best”

  1. Mornings are so rushed and frantic. I love pick ups when I get to do them. They are the best.I struggle with not getting so impatient and frustrated.

    • Pick ups are the best. I try to enjoy them especially before the rush of bed later. I’ve gotten better about unplugging to have that time with them.

  2. My kids have started to saying “you’re awesome” for little things, so that brings about big smiles from me.

    The other week, I took my kids with me to visit a friend in Ohio. At one point, Leila was throwing a temper tantrum and CJ was climbing all over me — both “I don’t want to go to bed” tactics. I just let them continue with whatever they were doing & was then able to put them to bed with minimal fuss . . . but the entire time, I felt “holy shit, these friends are seeing what a sham of a parent I am.”

    Only, as soon as I had the kids down, both of the parents I was with told me that they were in awe of my patience (their kids were all grown up) – how they’d have lost it a few times during the struggle.

    Someone told me, once, that the only good parents are the ones who are CERTAIN that they’re not doing it right. I think that holds true today, as it did for our parents.

    • That’s an awesome story, John. Thank you. It’s almost like they just need to run their course. It’s so awesome though to be appreciated, even for the little things–even if only to know you’re doing a good job to raise polite little grateful humans.

  3. I think the key is? To understand that your mother said the exact same thing to herself. She was sure that HER mother did it better and made it look easier. The beauty of parenting is that our children seem to somehow not see the frustration, the angst. They only see our presence, our love and feel our kisses. You’re a FANTASTIC mom, my friend.

    • You’re right. It’s amazing how they see what we’re positive is the glaring failure in front of them. And even if they do, they’re quick to forgive. I’m thankful for you being in my village!

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